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Went to a meeting/luncheon today and was disappointed to see that the food being served was your choice of enormous wraps, pasta salad, pickles and what looked like "homemade" potato chips. Not exactly great fare for a low-carber like me. But I made do. No chips. Ate about 2 tablespoons of the pasta salad. Chose the steak fajita wrap and dug out all the innards from the wrap and just ate the steak, lettuce, tomato, grilled peppers and onions and the sprinkling of cheese that was on the inside. Oh. Ate the pickles, too.
My old boss hosted this meeting/luncheon (I was asked by her to serve on this advisory board), and when she saw me she told me that I looked great! (yay)
She also said, "You'll have to tell me all your secrets."
I've heard that or something similar to that from folks every now and then since I've dropped about 65 pounds from my all-time high.
And you know what I've determined? They really don't want to know that you just quit eating so much and that you're really watching what you eat. They really don't want to know that you restrict calories (or sugar or carbs or fat or whatever it is that you are keeping in check). They really don't want to know that you write down EVERY. SINGLE. THING that you put in your mouth. And if you're going to the gym (I'm not, just saying if you are) They really don't want to know that you're busting it in the gym--hard--every day and for how long.
I know what they want to hear, because I remember what I used to be very interested in (before I started doing the HARD, very HARD, work of keeping my food choices under control). I *always* wanted to hear about the easy fixes. And I admit, I *still* read those articles and testimonials of folks who are taking this particular nutritional supplement pill that "melts away fat." Or, just sprinkle every thing you eat with red pepper flakes. Or, just take 2 tblsp of apple cider vinegar a day. I *still* want all those things to be true, too. But...the truth of the matter is, for me, it's just plain hard. I don't eat whatever I want anymore. And if I do eat something "off plan," I have to make room for it in my week by cutting back somewhere else.
I think I've learned that when someone asks me that question in the future, I'm just going to smile and say, "Oh--I'll never tell!" 'Cause THAT will really keep their interest.
P.S. I hope this doesn't sound like I am resentful to those folks who are seeking answers, 'cause I'm not. And I love my old boss, and she's wonderful, and I'm glad that she noticed that I'm shrinking. It's just that I also notice, somehow, that people's excitement fades and disappointment sets in when you actually try and answer the question honestly (they can't help it). 'Cause I could talk about this all day. I'm excited about the changes I've made. Go me!
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 Comments
That is an excellent observation of the "question behind the question"
28 Oct 15 by member: msvanhorn
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What's your secret? As you said discipline, but that's not a secret, it's hard work. Congratulations on your success thus far, maybe you can expand your advisory role to include one secret, alternate foods for your next meeting.
28 Oct 15 by member: A Big Boy
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It slices ,it dices , it's the latest thing since sliced bread, if you call within the next 10 minutes I'll include a fantastic workout routine that will guarantee those shredded abs so now that I've got you're attention. It's the wonderful new concept where you can eat what you want whenever you want and it's called....
I'm sexy and I know it
That was a fantastic story that I can relate very well too. Keep up the great work. You're awesome
28 Oct 15 by member: latincharmer
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Very astute! Now, if I could just find the motivation..... :)
28 Oct 15 by member: NikkiJP
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Go you! And I totally agree. Of the dozens and dozens of people who have asked me, and a couple of dozens who manifested any kind of interest in DOING the journey, only two have actually come on this path and are doing the work for it. I'm meaner than you, though. Most of the time when I get asked, I pat gently their cheek and say "too hard for you to try it, honey". Yea, I'm evil like that.
28 Oct 15 by member: dayberndt
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HaHa! I've noticed the same thing about people that ask how I lost weight. As soon as I say Low Carb, I cut out all pasta bread sugar their eyes glaze over and 99% of them say "oh no, I couldn't live without that. The other 1% just say good job. Not a single person has actually asked for details!
28 Oct 15 by member: Rckc
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Go You, Girl!! Keep on keeping on!
28 Oct 15 by member: Shines27
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Yeah but out of all the people that have not listened think of the one or two that will listen and the change that it will make in their life. I feel the same way. When you start telling people the truth of how hard it is they zone out. There is that person every once in awhile that does take you seriously because they are looking for the same thing.
28 Oct 15 by member: wildpot
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Recall one time my sister-in-law (who lives interstate) had thinned down incredibly from last time I'd seen her and I asked "What's your secret?" Her answer: "S double M". Me: Never heard of it. What is it? SIL: Shut my mouth! Her retort was so quick - she totally cracked me up!! She'd decided to "SMM" to bread, cakes (still baked for my brother though) and a few other foods she knew weren't doing her any favours. She's kept it all off permanently and looks fantastic.
28 Oct 15 by member: lh1844
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SMM. I like it!! I do usually say that I just quit eating so much. I am sort of waiting for that one person who reallllly wants to know more. Maybe someday.
28 Oct 15 by member: dbdmom
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I couln't have said it better myself! I have been losing weight (and regaining it) now for about 20 years, and you're right, people don't want to know the truth. Its too hard. They think its a miracle cure that you have discovered. Those people don't give you enough credit and down deep inside they know that its hard work but don't want to admit that you put in the hard yards. Congratulations on losing 65 pounds - that is fantastic! Keep up the hard work :)
28 Oct 15 by member: angelica_95
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It's all true. Fat people do not want to give up their precious truckdriver sized portions, their second helpings, and their all-day grazing habits. I've reached the point of scorn.
28 Oct 15 by member: soonsoonsoon
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Body image-wise, I still consider myself to be in the "fat person" camp. I am getting healthier week by week, month by month, but when you are surrounded by 18-22 yr old college coeds, it is hard to see yourself anything other than overweight. Thank goodness I don't live in Hollywood!! But you know what? I am pushing 49, mother of 5, grandmother, and I am not needing to wear a bikini at the beach or needing to look "hot" out at a club. I just need to be healthy enough to keep up with my kids and grandbabies and to not end up in an early grave due to heart disease or stroke or developing even more serious health problems than I have already.
I am happy to share my "secrets" with anyone who really wants to hear about it.
28 Oct 15 by member: dbdmom
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You have come to accept all that it takes to have weight loss success AND are doing what you need to. Vigilance, focus, dedication and making the choice to do the more difficult thing are all qualities those who win the weight loss game embrace. Yeaaaa! you!
28 Oct 15 by member: JovialJ
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Wait and see how awesome it will feel when you'll be looking for clothes in the "small" size rack. It was a real eye opener for me as I was going down from "XL" to "L" then to "M" - and then when I got the medium size clothes in the fitting room they were obviously too big. It felt soooo good to go put those back and go look in the "S" rack. I remember that in my mind the song "You're simply the best" of Tina Turner was blazing at full volume and I think I even did a few dance moves on the way to the small size clothing rack.
29 Oct 15 by member: dayberndt
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Dayberndt-I don't know if I'll ever EVER be a small; I wasn't ever a small even when I was in college--and I was skinny then. Always wore about a medium during and after college until after I was married.
I was just so excited the last time I bought clothes that I actually fit into a couple of items that were just plain "Large." Not XL, not XXL, not 2XL or 3XL, but just plain ol' L. That was enough to make me giddy. And...the other day, I went into Lane Bryant. I tried on 4 things, all in their smallest size available which is a 14 or 14/16. Everything fit. With wiggle room, even. I tried on a red dress, and...well, I LOOKED AWESOME. It wasn't practical, and $$$ is tight until payday, so I didn't buy anything. But I walked out of there on cloud 9. It was enough knowing that I could wear *anything* in their smallest size. Before I left, I took a selfie of myself in the mirror wearing that red dress (I have never done that before in my life) and texted it to my husband. That was fun. I said, "Hey. I'm not buyin' this, but I thought you should see that I am looking FABulous." He asked me why not buy it? :) Anyway...it also made me realize that if I can continue to steadily drop...I will no longer be able to shop at LB and I am going to have to relearn what it is like to shop in "regular" stores.
29 Oct 15 by member: dbdmom
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Never say never. Keep going on doing what you're doing and ... miracles can happen. :)
29 Oct 15 by member: dayberndt
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I know just what you mean. There are no quick fixes. It all takes determination and steady attention. Congratulations on your progress.
29 Oct 15 by member: zest7
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You are a success story, lady !!!
29 Oct 15 by member: carol in kinderhook
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